On occasion, my ex-wife suffers depressive episodes. For the past several weeks, she’s questioned her worth and value to others. Sleepless nights allows he wandering mind to value and revalue her gifts and worth.
“Why do you believe I am a worthy person?”
Gently, I replied, “Because you’re a great leader.”
“Humph,” she scoffed. “How?”
“Great leaders are those whose great acts are comprised of small deeds. Through all those small deeds, an unexpected, but purposeful leadership style emerges. The demons you believe are by your choice. But your choice is not mine. Do not let the seed of doubt destroy you.”
Sometimes, in life, we become both jurist and executioner to our own value. “Certainly, I am unworthy, for others have done more.” “Of course, that person over there is better, for I have not helped as many.” For many, false values consume both day and night.
I close with the following story.
One afternoon an ascetic met the Buddha. He was curious to learn about the Buddha’s teaching.
“Gautama, what is your teaching? What are your doctrines? For my own part, I dislike all doctrines and theories. I don’t subscribe to any.”
The Buddha smiled, “Do you subscribe to your doctrine of not following any doctrines? Do you believe in your doctrine of not-believing?”
Somewhat taken aback, the ascetic replied, “Gautama, whether I believe or don’t believe is of no importance.”
The Buddha spoke gently, “Once a person is caught by belief in a doctrine, he loses all his freedom. When one becomes dogmatic, he believes his doctrine is the only truth and that all other doctrines are heresy. Despair is birthed from such narrow views. Once bound, one becomes so entangled that it is no longer possible to let the door of truth open.”
If we are attached to some belief and hold it to be the absolute truth, we may one day find ourselves in a similar situation as my ex-wife. Thinking that we already possess the truth, we will be unable to open our minds to receive the truth, even if truth comes to our door.
Categories: Life Lessons