As few would guess, I solely watch the Cubs only to see how they will lose.  But as a Buddhist, even living in that moment, I felt much of the game, even much of baseball as a whole, pretty damn boring.  Thus, in being proactive, I found other things by which to keep me entertained.

First thing I counted was the number of professional baseball players wearing either a Phiten rope or a whole lot of gold chains. Phiten claims to “stabilize your electric current inside the body” by “allowing the flow of energy.” If there was ever a market for absurd, there it is. But professional baseball payers are a superstitious bunch. And God knows, if they get something down pat and win, then they’ll perform that pre-game, post-game routine every day.

From what I have read over the years, baseball has many Monk wannabe’s. Many baseball players believe it’s bad luck to step on the foul line when running onto the field. My only thought there would be thank God they don’t play football. Others practice the same routine of tapping their bat a specific number of times on home plate when they come up to hit. Outfielder Moises Alou believed the best way to fix calluses was by peeing on them.

Also, the amount of jewelry some baseball players wear is unbelievable. Seriously dude, if the National Weather Service issues a Severe Thunderstorm warning, “I ain’t standn’ next to you.” That load of jewelry is nothing more than positive ground. And if you’re a baseball player who cannot understand that, I’m not explaining it. Google it!

Last summer I attended a minor league game, seating near the dugout. One of the players complained to another player how he needed to gain speed. My first thought was to tell him to drop the three pounds crap around his neck, but valiantly, I remained silent. And if you’re a baseball player who cannot understand the concept of weight and drag, I’m not explaining it. Google it!

Remember these players are our idols. Thus, the satirist within exclaims what’s good for baseball is good for the office.  I mean what better way to make the boss’ report disappear than by peeing on it. If we honor Wade Boggs, every project manager should eat an entire fried chicken before work. If we mimic Turk Wendell, then each of us should brush our teeth after every meeting. And while Kevin Rhomberg was obsessed by having to touch a person back if they touched him, we should honor him by touching everyone at work. (Some may call that sexist, but I’m noting going there).

Oh Lord, I can feel the love.

From Buddhist perspective, do not get carried away by superstition. Do not believe in deeds; rather aspire to results through personal effort in a rational way. By doing so, you will not be excited by wildly rumored superstition, talismans or lucky charms as they do not produce results. Remember faith can move mountains, but it’s only via practice can one actually hit a 93 mile per hour fast ball.